Sunday, February 29

THE STUPID JOURNALIST AWARDS 2004:
 
Stupidest British Male:

Dominic Mohan.

George Michael’s long-awaited new CD, Patience, is out next month. And, given that this will be his first proper album in eight years, jolly good it should be too. But what’s this on the track listing? It appears to feature Shoot The Dog, his disastrous anti-Bush rant first released in August 2002 and, excuse me, is that Freeek, a rather forgettable single which dates back two years? By George, surely he hasn’t been struggling for material?

What, a popstar who puts two reasonably successful singles on his new album? Absurd!

Stupidest British Female:

Sue Caroll.

Cretinous, ill-educated teenagers gobbing in the street, pouring Hooch down their necks and roaming in gangs like knuckle-trailing Neanderthals terrorising the innocent and elderly.

Am I bothered? Do I look bothered? Look at my face. Is it bothered? Are you disrespectin' my family?